Highlights from being on a farm in Davidson for the weekend:

 

   - Shooting guns is fun. Shooting guns while dressed up like a Cletus is even more fun. Shooting guns while dressed up like a Cletus on farm land with targets being cans of Pilsner and old yellow oil jugs is a flippin' riot. Also, saying "bang bang" everytime you hit something is a pleasure only known to me. And everyone else who's done such things.

   - A .22 is quite possibly the pansiest of all guns. I'm pretty sure i could Cobain it with one of those and walk away with a headache.

   - Turkey bacon rules.

   - Everyone from neighbouring farms walks into farm houses pretty much unannounced. This can be disconcerting while you are doing things that you maybe shouldn't be.  Like...ummmmmmmmmm...drinking at 11 AM. (Certainly not me, of course.)

   - Every town in Saskatchewan has its own definition of "booze cruising." They vary wildly and should be clarified before performing. Certainly not by me, of course. Seriously.

   - Ground moose hamburgers (mooseburgers?) are goddamn tasty. Also, the leanest meat i have ever consumed. I made 3 pounds worth of giant patties thinking they would shrink but i was powerful wrong. Pure, unadulterated injections of protein straight to my stomach...oh lord. If Jesus made a burger, it would be a mooseburger.  As a side note, i really am a monster. I eat so much, children and small appliances stop working.  Side side note, whomever came up with the term 'gamey' for describing such meat is a moron. 'Gamey' as a descriptor really should be read: sour with a robust undercurrent of smokeyness. That actually means something. Describing game as gamey is like describing oranges as orangey. To someone who's never consumed oranges this means absolutely nothing. I only use oranges as a hyperbolic descriptive case because they seems to corner the market on retarded descriptors. Lets just call apples reds and plums purples.

   - How to make a friend in a small town: start talking. (seems to apply in dorms as well. With the added bonus of sex. Certainly not me, of course.)

   - My brain has a hard time processing someone telling me about how poor their family was when two breaths earlier they were telling me about how they flew to places in their private plane instead of driving 'because it was just faster.'

   - I need to work on my free-styling. Engineering is so <pause> wack/It makes me want to smoke <pause> crack

   - Point for Curtis. Perfect in every situation.